Welcome back to Karenworld!

Remember the fad ages ago when people would send you emails with like 100 questions and tell you under no uncertain terms, at the risk of your friendship being dissolved, to answer them and send them to your entire address book? Remember how you deleted these emails with a dismissive mouse click? Remember how you looked at these "friends" with disdain, scorn and a touch of botheration? Well, I'm sorry. I was one of the perpetrators. I'm my own favourite subject and I can't help but drag others into my crazy.

That said, my blog today is inspired by, well, me. I found these questions over at Peggy Sue's place and I thought I'd borrow them so I could get out of a real blog and tend to the 4 children in my care for the summer. BTW, any suggestions on what to do with 4 kids aged 14, 12, 10 and 9 months that'll keep any one of them from hating me, the activity or causing a humiliating scene will be greatly appreciated.

What colour are your socks right now?

I'm not wearing socks. Are you kidding, it's summer in Canada. I make up for it by wearing 2 pairs at a time from September to May.

What are you listening to right now?

I've got Regis and Kelly on in the background. I hate them so why? Three words: Taylor Lautner's abs.

What was the last thing you ate?

Last night I had a tortellini salad. Chicken, pasta, peppers, feta and a dressing of olive oil and honey. Heaven.

Can you drive a stick?

No, and when my husband tried to teach me that time I had fantasies of putting all his belongings in garbage bags on the road and seeing the look on his face as clutched and shifted (or whatever) the car back and forth over them.

Last person you spoke to on the phone?

Elliott's cadet convener Kathy. She was giving me all the details on his 3-week sleepaway camp. I'm thinking it'll be a great break for all of us.

How old are you today?

42. I love to say so because I don't feel it.

What is your favourite sport to watch on TV?

At World Cup time, soccer. During hockey season, hockey. Ooh, and figure skating. But not the girls. I like the pairs because it always looks like the man is trying his best to murder the woman. Wouldn't that make a great episode of Matlock? What? I'm showing my age? Umm... CSI, then.

What is your favourite drink?

Tea with Carnation milk and sugar in it. If you don't have Carnation, just sugar, thanks.

Have you ever dyed your hair?

I call the condition I suffered from "pregnancy induced dementia". It plagued me during the latter stages of my pregnancy with Henry. Among the varied symptoms, patients convince themselves that they would look gorgeous as a blond. They buy 2 boxes of pharmacy hair bleach and colour and spend the better part of an afternoon crying in frustration on the bathroom floor. When the deed is done, these unfortunate souls startle themselves in every mirror and plate glass window thinking that Dennis Rodman is stalking them. What? The age thing again? Ummm... Mary J Blige, then.

Favourite food?

Fast.

What is the last movie you watched?

Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog on the big screen yesterday at the Mayfair. I totally got my geek on.

Favourite day of the year?

It's a tie between Christmas and my birthday. Any day I get presents, really.

How do you vent anger?

I'm very passive aggressive. I'll write venom in a blog or in my diary then delete or tear it up. Then I'll pout or just sleep on it.

What was your favourite toy as a child?

I loved my "Fabulous Fred" (google it). I still have it downstairs but it doesn't work anymore. I think if I could ever get it fixed, my family would never see me again.

Favourite Season?

Summer, bar none.

Cherries or Blueberries?

Blueberries but cherries are a close second.

Living situation?

Husband, 3 kids, occasional baby, a cat, 7 fish and 3 gerbils.

When was the last time you cried?

Last night when my long lost nephew/godson contacted me (thank you Facebook!). We've missed him so much and haven't heard from him in at least 7 years.

What is on the floor of your closet right now?

Where do I start? Among other things, shoe boxes, shoes, dustbunnies, clothes that fell off the hanger, boots that don't fit and slippers.

What are you most afraid of?

Being disfigured or having an illness that withers the body but not the mind.

Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers?

The spicier the better.

Favourite dog breed?

I'm a cat person but if there was a law passed that I didn't have to pick up and walk around with my dog's warm poop in a plastic bag, I'd go for a dog like Benji. What again with the age thing? I give up. Google him.

Favourite day of the week?

Believe it or not, Monday. I love getting back to schedules and routines.

How many states have you lived in?

0. Provinces, 2. Quebec and Ontario. I visited 3 states, though: Delaware, New York and Florida.

Diamonds or pearls?

Are you kidding? Diamonds every time. Pearl is an old lady's name.

What is your favorite flower?

Not too crazy about cut flowers (they're great in gardens) but I love anything that comes in a gorgeous, rich, purply fuchsia or orange.

Did you get an H1N1 vaccine?

No way. I've never had the flu of any kind so I don't want to push my luck. I lined up with the kids to get theirs, though.

And there you go. Pass this on to all of the people in your address book or you'll have humiliating gas for the rest of the day. Hey, I don't make the rules...

kxx